Monthly Archives: July 2017

Saint James, Apostle
2 Corinthians 4:7-15 | Psalm 125(126):1-6 | Matthew 20:20-28

Indeed, while we are still alive, we are consigned to our death every day, for the sake of Jesus, so that in our mortal flesh the life of Jesus, too, may be openly shown. (2 Corinthians 4:11)

Over the last few months, I’ve found myself cooking almost half my daily meals, and all of them were pretty much vegetarian. As you might expect, I lost about 5kg and a couple of inches around the waist, and gained in turn a greater sense of energy along with a certain lightness of being.

I also noticed my body dying.

It’s not that “falling off a cliff” of end-stage cancer, or a terminal disease, or even an obese person climbing a flight of stairs. I just feel in spades what my senses couldn’t tell me before, whilst overloaded and blunted by the detritus of rich living.

Now that I’ve shed so much toxic badness, my senses have cleared to the point that I can actually feel myself getting very slightly slower and achier each day, with just a touch less stamina than the day before. As my cells start dying faster than they can be replaced, I expect to maintain this awareness till my last day on this earth.

It’s a mixed blessing, to be sure, but I’m thankful for the ability to feel it all.

✞ ✞ ✞ ✞ ✞

My spiritual life has evolved in a similar fashion. As I “die” more and more to my secular self, I’ve become more aware of what happens around me every day, particularly affronts to others, and to God through them.

I’m no longer inured to the growing hedonism that even affects some Catholics I know, and one of my closest friends is now dealing with the imminent breakdown of his “what God has joined, man must not divide” union.

And yet, I see life in the hope that springs from many friends’ daily struggle to live the Gospel life, and in my own journey along a similar path. As a collective Christendom, we die to ourselves each day, so as to shine forth with the joy and peace that knowledge of our Lord and our impending reunion with the Creator. As beacons of hope, we lead other struggling souls in the direction of righteousness and love, towards the One who Is.

At least, that’s the general idea, though even on a personal level, I probably need to polish and relight my beacon. Time to refocus on the Good and the Right.

And keep eating vegetables.

Lord, we fear dying to ourselves, because we place more trust in the mundane present of our sensual experience, than in the heavenly future of Your great promise. Help us to break that fear and dependence. Help us to truly die to our selfish selves, and raise us up to a new life of holiness.

For in You rests all our hopes and dreams, our joy and peace. Amen.

Monday of Week 16 in Ordinary Time (Year I)
Exodus 14:5-18 | Exodus 15:1-6 | Matthew 12:38-42

The Lord made Pharaoh, king of Egypt, stubborn, and he gave chase to the sons of Israel as they made their triumphant escape. (Exodus 14:8)

Failure is always an option, especially for those of us in leadership positions.

I would imagine that at least some of Pharaoh’s generals would have counselled against pursuing the Israelites, considering the ten plagues visited upon them by this demonstrably-mighty God. In this case, the Lord triggered Pharaoh’s stubbornness for His own purpose, to inspire His own people to perpetual awe and adoration–though of course we know what they did not long after.

Is our own stubbornness, in the face of our advisors’ opposition to our plans, inspired by God or man?

Before we face the challenges of each day, do we ask the Lord for enlightened steadfastness in the course of righteousness?

Or do we just rely on our own senses and intuition, disregarding all the warnings from others who know better?

One is indeed the loneliest number…but only if we choose to go it alone.

Lord, it’s hard sometimes to remember that You are always besides us, especially when we’re pressured into exercising our own flawed judgement. Remind us to seek You whenever we are confounded by our circumstances, to dwell in Your Holy Presence when we are beset by worry and indecision, and to take heed of the Spirit of Good Counsel who whispers in our hearts the path to righteousness and peace of mind.

For You alone are the Holy One, You alone are the Lord, You alone are the Most High. With You, we shall never be alone. Amen.

16th Sunday in Ordinary Time (Year A)
Wisdom 12:13,16-19 | Psalm 85(86):5-6,9-10,15-16 | Romans 8:26-27 | Matthew 13:24-43

We live in the midst of evil.

That’s the almost-daily reminder of our government, that there are terrorists active in neighboring countries, and more returning from failed escapades in Syria, Iraq and other trouble spots.

So too are we surrounded by spiritual darnel, those who would actively oppose us for our beliefs and choke our faith, a few physically, others with scorn, still others by flaunting temptations in our faces.

It’s that last group that is the most dangerous, who seduce with the fear of missing out (FOMO) on the earthly pleasures that everyone else is enjoying, espousing the popular thesis that you only live once (YOLO):

Aiyah, why you Catholics must fast on Fridays one? Too bad you can’t eat this delicious fried chicken. C’mon, just smell it, don’t you just want a taste?

Or the fear of being caught off-guard, with serious consequences:

You better bad-mouth him to your boss first, then confess at church later. God sure forgive one, OK? Anyway, if you don’t sabo him, you sure kena sabo yourself, and then how’s your God gonna help you?

Sometimes, as darnel only shows its true colour (black) when fully ripe, so do these antagonists only show their true colours after we’ve known then for a significant period.

But as the parable in today’s scripture reminds us, we have to live with them for the time being. We just have to stay faithful, and vigilant, and uninfected.

Yet, we are weak. There’s no denying that. This is why St. Paul reminds us through the Romans:

The Spirit comes to help us in our weakness. (Romans 8:26-27)

We are encouraged, nay, we must open ourselves up to the Holy Spirit, and to the Wisdom that is the Lord:

how the virtuous man must be kindly to his fellow men,
and you have given your sons the good hope
that after sin you will grant repentance. (Wisdom 12:19)

In the spirit (pun intended) of acronymic inscrutability, let us pray:

COSMAS (Come, O Spirit, ‘Midst All Strife),
DAMIAN (Dominate All Minds, Inspire All Nations),
so that we may
LOVE (Lift Our Voices Everyday)
in praise to our Creator.

Amen.

15th Sunday in Ordinary Time (Year A)
Isaiah 55:10-11 | Psalm 64(65):10-14 | Romans 8:18-23 | Matthew 13:1-23

Yesterday, a South Indian man boarded a Circle Line train bound for Dhoby Ghaut at Paya Lebar station. He looked around, then up at the route display. Within a few seconds, his face was a mass of confusion, but he continued to stare at the display.

He finally gave up whatever mental gear-grinding he was performing, and turned to the guy who appeared beside him, preparing to exit at the next station.

That guy…was me.

Lalsdfen Cawejr?

Pardon?

Losdaje Coerjt?

Sorry, still not understanding you.

It took several more rounds of confusion before I realized that he was asking:

Lorong Chuan?

I then informed him that he was traveling in the wrong direction, but another bumbling exchange made it clear that we had a language mismatch.

So I beckoned him to follow me out of the train at the next stop, walked him over to the station list at the center of the platform, pointed out each station up to Lorong Chuan (so that he could count off the stops to be sure), pointed him to the correct side of the platform to wait for the Harbourfront-bound train, then waved goodbye.

✞ ✞ ✞ ✞ ✞

Regular readers of this blog would’ve noticed that my posting frequency has gone from daily to sporadic. I’ve been firing mental and spiritual blanks more often than not in recent times, and while I understood that it would probably happen at some point, it was a little disturbing to run up against roadblocks so early in my God-blogging “career”.

Looks like it’s time for another spiritual refocusing, a conscious examen of the dark corners in my faith life, a quieting of my restless spirit, and a deep breath of the Ruach HaKodesh, the Holy Spirit.

But like the South Indian man I met yesterday, I had to overcome my own pride and ask for help from the One who knew better than anyone else the turmoil in my heart and head.

We’ve all encountered such personal “blockages” at one point on another, but do we trust Him enough to turn Son-wards as a first recourse, rather than a desperate final “roll of the dice”? Only when we collectively find the courage to do this, will scenes like this be commonplace again:

Jesus left the house and sat by the lakeside, but such large crowds gathered round him that he got into a boat and sat there. (Matthew 13:1)

Amen.

Thursday of Week 14 in Ordinary Time (Year A)
Genesis 44:18-21,23-29,45:1-5 | Psalm 104(105):16-21 | Matthew 10:7-15

In today’s reading, Joseph finally reveals himself to the brothers who sold him into slavery.

We too reveal ourselves to everyone around us, whether we know it or not. The way we treat others, our words both loving and judgemental, we basically show our inner selves, as we admit in our weekly Confiteor:

in my thoughts, and in my words,
in what I have done, and in what I have failed to do

Just yesterday, I was at the Church of the Holy Family with my oldest and avidly-atheist friend, who wanted to donate some of his old but otherwise usable shoes to the parish’s thrift shop.

On the spur of the moment, I asked him to wait for me, while I dashed upstairs to say a quick prayer.

To my surprise, he asked to follow me into church. This, coming from the man who asked not to be my best man at my wedding almost 20 years ago, so that he wouldn’t have to set foot in church.

After a few minutes in prayer, with my friend sitting quietly behind me, we repaired to the coffee shop next door for a refresher.

✞ ✞ ✞ ✞ ✞

How time has changed us all, as it mellowed the hatred of Joseph’s brothers and caused them to reflect on the harm they did to their kin.

Is this not a reminder to us all, to reflect on our own relationship with our Creator and our fellow beings? To reexamine our thoughts, our words, our deeds and omissions?

To, perhaps, make time for “coffee with Jesus”, as a fellow choir member providentially shared just this morning?

Amen.